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Mancinigate Ovah & Other Last-Minute Mercato Stuff

mancini.jpgAlessandro Faiolhe Amantino Jesus Mary & Joseph Mancini has been absolved from any more harassment at the hands of Olympique Lyon's resident nutbag, Jean-Michel Aulass. The official spokesperson of OL having this to say:

"We think €15m is a fair assessment of Mancini's value, but Roma told us that he is not for sale, so the talks didn't reach a conclusion."

Wonderful, however, they failed to mention one teensy weensy little part:

"And when we offered the €15m Daniele Prade was laughing so hard we weren't able to get a decisive answer so we just backed off and let him compose himself, at which point he said, 'Uhhhhh, no?'"

So Mancini stays, which was the expected outcome, but considering all of these "mysterious" circumstances surrounding his absence and lack of extension, it was pretty worrisome for a moment there - if only because Moratti, Mijatovic, Benitez & Friends would have been right behind Aulas in the bidding.

The other good mentioning in all of the hullabaloo is that he is supposedly on the verge of signing an extension until 2012, which has been expected since the middle of July, but yet to fully bloom in all its financial awesomeness. It appears that whole "can you give us a few weeks so that we can take care of those gaping holes in defense" theory regarding Rosella & Co. is the case, so you can all rest a little more peacefully with regards to Mancini's extension.

And are there any more updates on that flu/Bubonic plague/hoof-and-mouth disease he seems to have picked up in July which still hasn't gotten any better? As well as having me seriously question as to whether the AS Roma team physician is some guy giving free physicals and gynecological exams out of the back of his van outside the Olimpico from 12-4am. Which might explain why Roma was able to save a few extra euros and use them in the pursuit of Cicinho. Seriously, 6 week flu? And he hasn't been quarantined yet?

And if we're going to celebrate Amantino, we might as well do it right, right? Tha Back-Heel of God:

Amantino! Amantino! Amantino! Amantino! Amantino! (I don't care what you say, Inara. You'd love to have that on your team and you know it.)

Palermo - Roma Highlights.:

(All the Serie A goals of the weekened)

Mercato: T minus 5 Days.:

I) Despite filling in for some guy named Totti against Palermo, it was no secret that it would be Edgar "Burritos" Alvarez's last appearance in the Kappa kit this season. It looks like he's headed out on loan to Atalanta to give 'em a touch of speed on the flanks. Here's to hoping he scores 37 goals and creates a bidding war only surpassed by the one for Samuel Kuffour, who rechannels his turn-of-the-millenium Bayern Munich self - and then some - on loan, and becomes The Greatest Defender Of All-Time.

* - Now it looks like he may have a couple more suitors.

II) Speaking of Samuel "Lazyass" Kuffour, that whole move to Sunderland to be coached by Roy "I Go Studs Up On Me Mum" Keane thing didn't work out (hmmm...wonder why?). Now it looks like he has Bolton Wanderers, being led by their talismanic #10, Christian Wilhelmsson, and Derby County - who may or may not be relegated by Christmas - as his prime options. Oh, and there's always Qatar, because, uh, who the hell knows. But maybe we can fool some Arab Sheikh into thinking he's not-quite-so-useless and offer up big scrilla for him. That should work.

III) Speaking of Qatar (weak segues, I know), Shabani Nonda is almost done sorting out his contract details and looks to be moving east to some league that doesn't really matter and time to try and reclaim that ridiculous L1 form (and collect some big paychecks while he's at it). No mention of a transfer fee yet, but I'm getting visions of big petro dollars. Like big enough to start a war over or something.

According to Reggina's resident nutbag of a president, Pasquale "Lillo" Foti, Roma has never made an offer for Francesco Modesto.


Despite actually getting on the pitch after only being with the team 3 days, I don't see Cicinho starting against Siena - no matter how weak they are. He was only on for 15 minutes and basically played as a help-defender to RB as a RW in a game which Roma had the comfortable lead. I'd expect he gets more pitch time, but I think the first game he'll start will be against Reggina in Week 3. Just a hunch. So start penciling him into the Roma XI against Siena.

Apparently Palermo's scouting isn't all that wonderful, as evidenced by Stefano Colantuono's statement before the game:

“There is no such thing as an unbeatable squad. Roma play dynamic football at speed and try to always keep the ball on the ground.”

Well good, because it's not like Roma scored after only 3 minutes on a cross through the box or anything. Wouldn't that make him look silly.

VII) I failed to put this is the season preview, but I figured why not put out my predicted standings if I was going to predict mostly nonsensical crap (like Most Illegal Contacts Midseason). I did this before the preview on Thursday, so this week's results didn't factor in - as you may be able to goes:

1. Roma
2. Inter
3. Milan
4. Juventus
5. Fiorentina
6. Palermo
7. Sampdoria
8. Udinese
9. Lazio
10. Empoli
11. Torino
12. Atalanta
13. Parma
14. Reggina
15. Livorno
16. Genoa
17. Napoli
18. Siena
19. Catania
20. Cagliari

Honestly, 11-16 probably doesn't matter as they'll all finish with in a couple points of each other. Surprises of the year will be Udinese growing up, Lazio struggling (bitches) and Napoli sucking a lot worse than people think (as evidenced by the Cagliari game). In fact, I wouldn't be surprised to see them relegated again - not that I want that - their squad is just not impressive at all. No offense to the Napoli offside.

Quote of the day. Actually, quote of the week, the month and probably the year, courtesy of ex-Giallorossi legend (and some of us hoping future), Damiano Tommasi:

"I won things with that shirt and I know what it means. In no other city does a victory mean as much as in Rome."