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Totti Tuesday: ‘Doctor Evil, the color of money & death metal’

Less is more. Less Roma gametime this weekend, more stuff to talk about what’s going on in Zemanlandia these days. And all of this under the critical eye of me, the person with more sarcasm than Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother and Doctor Evil from Austin Powers combined.

Claudio Villa - Getty Images

Italy Icons


Osvaldo scoring for Italy also benefits Roma while the Azzurri offer a nice distraction for DDR amid the rumors of a possible row between Daniele and Zeman. Roma won against Atalanta so basically, Daniele and Osvaldo don’t have any reason to criticize the trainer for being omitted. The team’s always priority no 1.
And surprise surprise, both Osvaldo and Daniele or being linked to other clubs again namely Juve (Ozzy) and PSG/Man Shity (DDR). Even Verratti ‘I don’t know what a PSG is but I like the color of money’ has a say in this. If Zeman doesn’t start both next weekend, expect more rumor mongering and drama… and that’s just how we like it at Roma.

Oppah Stadium Style!


Names are being thrown left and right here in Church. Please allow me to throw in some more (Pallotta should at least consider three of them):


- Stadio JonAS Roma (just kiddin’…………………………….….. no actually I’m not)
- Stadio John Carew
- Stadio Lana Del Rey (Chris, Bren and Dhaw will understand and approve it)
- Stadio ‘John Arne Riise is making a sandwich’
- Stadio ‘where the f*ck is the running track?’
- Stadio ‘don’t worry if you are 2-0 behind, you’ll win here eventually’
- Stadio ‘have you seen my pants?’
- Stadio ‘Tare chi?’

Notes

• Now, I know I’m omitting the greatest Roma player ever and Zeman will never change his vision but bear what me for a sec. Once, just for once, I’d like Il Boemo to play a Ranieriesque 4-3-1-2 with Lamela behind both a Destro and Osvaldo on fire. Damn, I just barfed rainbows.

• I found this formation on Romaforever.it, during a training on Saturday (so without internationals): Goicoechea; Taddei, Marquinhos, Burdisso, Nego; Perrotta, Tachtsidis, Guberti; Lamela, Tallo, Marquinho

Say whuuut? Guberti? I know he’s suspended till 2015 and all because of Calciopoli but what the hell is he still doing in Roma? He gives Roma a bad name just like Bon Jovi gave love a bad name.
Also, nice to know Tallo and Nego are still breathing.

• Finally it’s here. No, not the love letters from Aquilani or the iPhone 4612. Burdisso’s iTunes list. Not quite the death metal and pig slaughter songs we expected from our boy Nico but Pearl Jam, Audioslave and Foo Fighters are a welcome change compared to all the Latin ‘shake yer Kardashian-butt’ songs.



Next weekend, Serie A’s back with Genoa – Roma. And whoever says Genoa, says spectacle and goals. Lots of ‘em. The 4-3 of ‘10-‘11 under Ranieri (he resigned after that game) and magical 3-0 under Spalletti (with a goal from Cicinho) spring to my mind. Now it’s Zeman’s turn to write history at the Marassi. As of now, 5-5 is a more safe bet than 2-1 IMO. Bring on the tank (no, not you Denis…)!

Ps: keep an eye on Destro too who’s facing his former club. It’s time to explode Mattia