Totti Tuesday: The Butterfly

And stop those porn downloads. And with porn, I obviously mean both Pjanic’s goals against Napoli and Strootman’s wet shirt after 90 minutes.

After Napoli and before I wrote this column, I had the imminent urge to watch The X-Files: I Want to Believe. 1) because I love David Duchovny ever since I started watching Californication and 2) because I WANT to believe. Not in aliens. Not in a mighty return of Aleandro Rosi or Vitorino Antunes. Not in a possible future date with either Candice Swanepoel (no chance), Mila Kunis (highly improbable) or Jennifer Lawrence (forget it). Not in the virginity of Miley Cyrus nor the soberness of Lindsay Lohan. You know what I’m talking about.

In Serie A’s history, only one team managed to win its first eight games. Juventus did it on three occasions, well two times legally anyway. And they won the S-word three outta three times. Roma ain’t Juve. Hell, Roma even ain’t Roma anymore. There are no clusterfucks, there is no Flubber in goal, no nervous centerbacks, no flamboyant and exentric attackers,no indifferent manager on the sideline. There’s only this squad of about 25 players who are eager to prove themselves and would do anything for each other. And for their boss Rudi. And the fans, the emblem, the staff, from the athletic coach to the physiotherapist to the local mailmans of Ostiense and Trastevere. Roma didn’t outplay Napoli on Friday, Napoli wasn’t particularly worse than Roma. That day, like at Inter, Roma just wanted the win more. Not for first place or good-looking statistics. No. Because that’s what people simply expect them to do. Humble yet confident. Organized yet unpredictable. Passionate yet composed. With a tiny bit of arrogance. To once again be that Roma we all know and love. Finally.

And there are more Roman breathtaking numbers to slap around the head of other jealous tifosi around the world. One goal conceded in the first eight games: Only Milan did it in 1993. Five clean sheets in a row: Hasn’t happened to Roma in ten years. Two or more goals scored for eight consecutive games in Serie A: Udinese last managed that in 2009 (all courtesy of footballitalia.net).

From the brilliance of Pjanic, the hair of Dodò, the muscles of Benatia to the runs of Florenzi, the handsomeness of Marco and the reflexes of De Sanctis. This team fits like a glove. I simply can’t write anymore praise nor can I find any weak points or comments about Roma nowadays. Keeper, defence, midfield, attack all do their job. The front three hustle, the fullbacks make overlapping runs, Pjanic and Strootman are everywhere, general De Rossi and his two captains Castan and Benatia clean up the dirty work. And in case of emergency, there’s always Morgan Batman to save the day. No Totti no party? No Roma, no party. The party doesn’t stop, not even after Udine. Because Roma is sitting safely in CL places and has already proved and given us more than in the entire 2012-2013 season. Joy, fun, passion and grinta. We simply can’t demand more of them right now. They are on the right track and unstoppable. Like the train in that movie called… errrhm… Unstoppable.

Special mention to Marten Portoise’s previous post. He had it right all along. The derby on May 26 changed it all. There was a twist mentally, in the entire club. This had to be their year. In the space of four months, Roma transformed from an ugly smelly larva to a beautiful and graceful butterfly… A ten stories tall one with effin’ machine guns, machetes and mortars on its back. But nonetheless a butterfly. Which playfully frolics from one victim to another. Faultless. It can only be halted by a worthy opponent, as commanding and impressive as themselves. Who might that be? That’s anyone’s guess. But I bet it won’t be Udinese. No, never. Not Udine. Not there. Not them. Roma won’t fail. Can’t fail. Not now. Not just yet. I want them to continue. To march on this road.I want them to believe now. I want to believe. I want to. Now. It is time.

Scudetto.