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The Great Roma Questionnaire Extraordinaire Revisited, Part I

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Even though we waited a few weeks into the season before proffering our best guesses for the year that lay ahead, your faithful CdT crew was still way, way off. Join us as we ridicule those bold/stupid enough to predict anything Roma related.

Paolo Bruno

Back in the summer, the CdT crew tackled a series of questions and made a bunch of haphazard guesses about the season to come. While we didn't exactly reinvent the blogging wheel during this undertaking, you have to remember, we were all still haunted by the ghosts of May 26th, and despite our best intentions, we were all a bit pessimistic about the latest in a series of eternal experiments in the Eternal city.

So, now that the season is officially one day in the books, let's take a look back at how we did; many of you took your own stab in the comments, so you're not safe from the mockery either.

This was an in-depth predictive exercise, one that was alternatively sophomoric and serious, so for brevities sake, we'll split it up and just focus on the best and worst of our predictions.

The Great Roma Questionnaire Extraordinaire Redux, Part I:

1. Where will Roma finish?

Worst Guess: Three way tie between Chris, Dhaw and Sam, though Sam was particularly prescient:

5th, I suspect our heart rates will be pushed somewhere near the Champions League spots with about a month to go, but the back end of the season will bite.

Well, he was certainly spot on about the back end of the season, fortunately the front end was more than enough to cover their spring swoon.

Best Guess: Jonas

3rd. Don't listen to the other guys. Our starting eleven are definitely contenders for a top three finish. If one or more important pieces (Maicon, Pjanic, Totti etc.) go down for a long time, we might just make it into EL. But without any midweek games (except Coppa and I expect Garcia to rotate) and a bit of luck, the squad of Livorno/Hellas can compete with Juve, Napoli and co until the very end. Therefore, Destro needs to return ASAP.

He was certainly correct about Destro, the club's leader in goals, while he was the only one brave enough to pick Roma safely in the top three.

2. Roma's Top Scorer

Worst Guess: Sam

This is the spot you are meant to put your striker, I've seen this before. I'm going to cheekily share it with Boriello and Florenzi.

Sorry, mate. You can't win them all, the hedging of Sam's bet did him no favor here.

Best Guess: Vahakn

Destro, because Football Manager told me so. With Pjanic on his silky-smooth game and Totti still (forever) omniscient, how could a striker not score. Note: Gervinho is not a striker.

Though Dhaw and myself earn partial credit. Me for nailing Totti's eight goals and predicting a spread of 7-10 goal scorers and Dhaw for coming ever so close to predicting Gervinho's goal haul-he predicted double digits, and G'Ho notched nine, but our wayward writer was the only one among us bold enough to pick Destro.

3. Roma's top assist man?

Worst Guess: Jonas

Ljajic or Pjanic. Anyway, it's gonna be a player with -ic (Gervinhic? Dodic?).

Best Guess: Everyone else

Totti was the only logical choice here, and with 10 dimes, Totti filled the bill, but kudos to Jonas for taking a chance.

4. Will Totti crack a double-double again? (10 goals, 10 dimes)

Worst Guess: Dhaw

Depends on Ilary.

Totti's husbandly duties didn't seem to deter his performance this season, but leave it to Dhaw to stir up a domestic controversy a continent away

Best Guess: Jonas

Assists: yes. Goals: Doubtful. Maybe if you count in the Champions League and Europa League games. Nevermind.

Totti fell two goals short, so credit to the Belgian sensation for knowing when to hold ‘em and when to fold ‘em

5. How many goals will Gervinho score?

Worst Guess: Vahakn

85. By the way, the word "won't" isn't spelled w-i-l-l.

Ah, Vaho. I have no idea where you are, but tisk, tisk, don't you ever doubt the Ivorian Enigma again.

Best Guess: Sam

8, through sheer weight of chances. That is also including an autogol.

He was only one away, that Aussie was onto something back in September

6. How many goals will Sir Nutella Face score? (Note: Zero is an accepted answer. You're an imbecile and you should be removed from the gene pool snappishly, but it is accepted.)

Worst Guess: Bren

I don't know who that is.

What can I say? I was a little late on the nickname game.

Best Guess (ish): Dhaw

As many calories there is in ½ teaspoon of Nutella

The internet tells me there are 200 calories in a serving of Nutella (2 tablespoons), but I don't know enough about baking to make that conversion, so we'll give it to Dhaw for creativity

7. How many goals will Coco score for Tottenham?

Worst Guess: Franco Baldini

You really screwed the pooch on this one, Franco

Best Guess: Walter Sabatini

  • Zero: the number of goals Lamela scored for Spurs in the Premiership.
  • Twenty eight and-a-half: The number, in millions, of pounds sterling Sabatini scored for Roma.

8. Who will win the scudetto? (Anything but Juventus is actually accepted. See Sir Nutella Face question for the rest of it.)

Worst Guess: Bren

Whats a Scudetto?

I still don't know

Best Guess: Dhaw

Whoever can buy the referees.

We kid, we kid. Congratulations on your 32* titles, Juve. Nice job.

9. Who will net the remaining two Champions League spots?

Worst Guess: Sam

Napoli and Fiorentina.... Gomez is a mad signing and is Rossi.

Sure he got one right, but he just had to embellish his answer, didn't he? Sometimes it just doesn't pay to go the extra mile, kids. Lesson learned

Best Guess: Bren/Jonas

If only because we were the only two to actually include the word ‘Roma' in our answers.

10. Europa League places?

Worst Guess: Bren

Obviously two of the remaining three from above, but I'll throw Lazio, Milan and Udinese in there. It'll be a vicious fight for the title of Ms. Congeniality of Serie A.

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. I was way off, my blunder.

Best Guess: Vahakn

Roma, Fiorentina, Inter.

Two out of three, and really, we probably all thought Roma was an EL team anyway.

11. Who will be Capocannoniere?

Worst Guess: Sam, Vahakn, Chris...er, Marten

They all had Mario Gomez, and you can't really blame them, he lit the Bundesliga on fire for years, but simply couldn't get on the pitch for the Viola.

Best Guess: Jonas

Luca Toni

Jonas was only three goals away from being correct. Who but the Belgian could have predicted the handsomest man in Italy would bag 20 goals this year, and at age 36 to boot?

Bravo, Jonas. Bravo.

12. Flop of the season?

Worst Guess: Jonas

Kaka. Now watch him score 25 goals and give Milan the Scudetto. Cassano close second. He'll crumble away at Parma and no one's gonna remember him by March.

Welp, Antonio Cassano faired pretty well for Parma, as his 12 goals and six assists helped guide the Crusaders into the Europa League

Best Guess: Bren

Fabio Quagliarella...wait, you said flip flop, right?

Too bad, Fabio. Sure, you were "part of" a Scudetto team, but with only 17 appearances and one goal, maybe you should've accepted that Borriello-Gila three way after all.

The questionnaire took a more serious turn from here on out, with each of us giving, like, real, thought out answers, so we'll tackle those in a couple of days, but here is the first half rundown.

The Scoreboard

Bren: 3 Best Guesses (BGs), 3 Worst Guesses (WGs)...balance, people. Balance.

Sam: 2 BG, 5 WGs....oof, let's hope he rebounds in the second half

Jonas: 5 BGs, 2 WGs. Look at Jonas, he's the California Chrome of calcio prognosticators

Dhaw: 3.5 BGs, 2 WGs. Barely, just barely, keeping his head above water

Vahakn: 3 BGs, 2WGs...he's our Fox News, fair and balanced

The Artist Formerly Known as Marten: 0 BGs, 3 WGs. I guess he gets credit for creating the survey, though. Right?